The Diaz Brothers
Lyrics
Cops and robbers, strictly bargain line
Spend the wet night tracking visions through the pines
Draw my arms into my hospital gown
See the sky open up and rain down
Rain down
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Hear my rivals1 on the western wind
Hard to know who might or might not be your friend{#]
Work by the plutonian light
Forbidden rosary prayers all night2
All night
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Beam of a flashlight
All night in the woods
Hunt us like dogs3
And then4 string us up for good
Keep one step ahead of enemies5
Foretell worse things than such frightful4 nights as these
Lead us to the beach by our hands
And bury us there in the sand7
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Mercy for the Diaz brothers
Banter
- JD: I always have a hard time keeping track of who I have introduced and who I have not, but my band is more important than I am. On the bass, Peter Gregory Hughes [note: unfortunately not legally Peter Peter Hughes, which is a shame] [raucous cheering]. On the saxophone, Mr. Matt - he hasn't been in the band long enough for me to have learned his middle name - Douglas. [cheering]
Peter: It's a saxophone, right?
Matt (off mic): Gordon!
JD: Matthew Saxophone Douglas. [laughs, cheering] Matthew Gordon Douglas. And what I consider the most Catholic name of the bunch, mine included, Mr. Jonathan Patrick Wurster. [Peter plays a cool bass thing and Wurster does drums.] We'd like to play a song that is a very Catholic song, insofar as everybody who means to turn their shit around still winds up getting what they have coming to them. It's about a couple of guys in a movie by Brian de Palma [sp?] called Scarface, who are known as the Diaz Brothers, and the song is called The Diaz Brothers. (2017-06-01 The Fillmore)
- I used to go to Catholic Mass in Spanish and you learn to say "ten piedad", "have mercy". One of these days I'm going to get this song translated into Spanish. It's gonna be rippin'. (2019-05-07 Mr. Smalls Theatre)
- This is a song about great religious piety. (2021-08-06 The Orange Peel)
- I was watching a bleeped version of Scarface on TV. And I had a two year old in the house. I got excited about a particular line in the movie, and I repeated it. He laughed from the next room. And I said to my two year old, I'm gonna extend this joke, and I'm gonna write a whole song on the piano. This is called the Diaz Brothers. (2021-08-19 Gothic Theatre)
- I get all cantankerous when people tell me they're going to play No Children at their wedding. And they do that, and it's a terrible idea. And I try not to say - someday I will be the honest man and say, no no, that's a terrible idea. Your marriage won't last. Turn back! But I don't say that, I just tell them I don't wanna be the guy at the wedding where the parents say 'Oh who's the musical guest you paid for?' 'Hey! No children!' This is the song people should ask us to play at their wedding. We'll show up in tuxedos. White tuxedos! This song is for all my friends in their white tuxedos. (2023-07-13 The Vanguard)
- [crowd starts yelling for a drum solo, Wurster plays, instead of a drum solo, the beat to "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover"]
JD: Step out the back, Jack. [laughing] Uh, on violin and guitar is Isa Burke, who literally had - [pause for cheering] - who literally had her first rehearsal with us like, three weeks ago. [more cheering] And tonight in San Francisco she's going to experience the first time John calls an audible of a song she hasn't played with us before. But Isa, it's in C, you know.
Isa: Thank you.
JD: And I wrote it, so it's not like it's gonna go like, C to like, Ebmaj7 or something. [Peter teaches Isa the chords in the background] It's a song about two guys who are dead. Before they died, they were murdered. It is a dance number, but it's also kind of, Jon, I would say, a tender ballad. Do you know what I'm talking about, Jon? Yeah! I'm talking about the Diaz Brothers! (2023-10-05 August Hall)
- You know, there comes a time in every band's life where they have to play the Diaz Brothers. [Wurster counts off loud enough to be heard in the other mics, band starts] This is a dance number! (2023-10-07 Ace of Spades)
- JD: Matt, are you ready to play some saxophone? Jon Wurster?
Wurster: Uh, yes.
JD: Are you ready to tell the world?
Wurster: I am ready to shout to the world.
JD: The sad but true story of two fellas who are dead before you meet 'em. 'Course I speak to you of the legendary, entirely forgotten, hermanos Díaz. The Diaz Brothers. (2023-10-29 The Heights Theater)
Live Performances
Footnotes
- 1. "down on the western wind" (2019-05-07)↩
- 2. "pray them all night" appended (2023-10-05, 2023-10-07, 2023-10-29), "all night" repeated (2021-08-06)↩
- 3. "hunt us like the dogs we are" (2019-05-07, 2021-08-06)↩
- 4. "and then you can string us up" (2021-08-06, 2023-10-05, 2023-10-07, 2023-10-29)↩
- 5. "my enemies" (2021-08-06, 2023-10-07, 2023-10-29)↩
- 6. "spiteful" instead of "frightful" (2019-05-07, 2021-08-06)↩
- 7. "face first!" (2022-09-20), "bury us face first!" (2023-10-05), "bury us face down!" (2023-10-07, 2023-10-29), "please just bury us there in the sand, neck deep!" (2021-08-06)↩
[#] "best friend" (2021-08-06)